First day of the month. First day of a new beginning.
Traveling alone to San Francisco was not my original plan, but I have learned that when those original plans don't work out, you have to improvise. Hm. Improvisation. Never really a strong point for me- quite scary actually. I'm used to the play by play method of making itineraries and purchasing tickets ahead of time.
Well that method went out the door over the bushes and crashed into the lake. I was on my own in pretty much a physical AND emotional way. Let me try and put it in perspective for you: Have you ever asked your mother about a week in advance to make you your favorite dish for a weekend dinner and you spend all week anticipating that delicious meal your going to be having? Well, what happens when come Friday night your mother tells you that she won't be making you that meal because she didn't get a chance to go food shopping all week? I'll tell you what happens- you break down. Your stomach growls, your palms sweat, your heart races and you feel confused and bewildered not knowing where to turn. Uh huh, yea well we have both experienced that feeling of desertion. Don't worry though because you manage to rise above the situation because of a little thing called leftover surprise.
Immediately, I wanted to hop on the plane and leave all my troubles behind in Philadelphia, which coincidentally acted like a safe haven for me. I was running. Escaping maybe? But mostly leaving as a means to seek a new environment where maybe I could find peace. I was running thousands of miles west with no one chasing after me. Maybe that is how I wanted it deep down inside and how it needed to be. I finally (and when I say finally I mean after months and months) realized the importance of my needs, my wants, and my life enough to inspire me to begin my lifelong journey.
Tears no more.
It was time for me to live. I know there is a world of people to meet and places to visit that I must experience in order to deepen the awareness to my life's purpose.
Let the traveling begin...
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